I'm sitting here outside a resort in Connecticut thinking about my journey and how I've handled it thus far. I spent some nights crying and I spent some praising God. Most of my nights I felt lonely as if I was fighting this fight alone. No one really knew how I felt, just God and me. When everyone went home and my phone stopped going off, it was just me and God. I wanted to lay on someone's lap while they rub my bald head, just to let me know that they are here by my side. I wanted someone to wipe my tears when my mind wondered. It was those nights when I felt alone. I'm so glad that joy came in the morning! I would wake up with a new attitude. I am determined to not let this cancer control my spirit. I can't even explain how I felt and the discomfort I was in. When I try, tears form because the pain of it all still lingers in my heart and mind. My Good Friend Sandy said that I will forget the bad stuff one day. I can't imagine ever forgetting that pain. I lost a lot of things during this journey and some I'll never get back. I know these things don't make me, but it was a part of me.
I have another surgery on June 11th. After that, I can start radiation. I'm already trying to figure out how to fight back during that process. Five days a week for 5 weeks they will zap my ass. They said I will have burns on my chest and it will cause fatigue. Wow, more fatigue. I want my life back, so I endure this bullshit and keep fighting. This journey is not for the weak, I must say. It's for the strong and if you're not strong, you will be when it's all said and done. Trust me, I get tired but I know I have to keep pushing. So, I wipe my own tears and run my own head because I know that JOY comes in the morning! #thinkpink all day, every day!
Lisa
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
Know that no matter what you are going through, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Be an advocate for your own help. Look up instead of down.
Saturday, June 2, 2012
Friday, June 1, 2012
A text message from a friend!
My Dear Lisa; if someone took your journey in the past five years away from you, how strong would your faith be today? Who would you be? Where would you be?
I responded: Gosh, that's a deep question because God knows this journey has increased my faith, shown me strength I've never known and has made me a more humbled person. I'm thankful for this journey. May my walk benefit someone else's struggle by knowing that if I can make it, they can make it too! Love you Will Kane!
I love this man! He is a steady friend and I appreciate him.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
I responded: Gosh, that's a deep question because God knows this journey has increased my faith, shown me strength I've never known and has made me a more humbled person. I'm thankful for this journey. May my walk benefit someone else's struggle by knowing that if I can make it, they can make it too! Love you Will Kane!
I love this man! He is a steady friend and I appreciate him.
- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone
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